This is beautiful! I have a lot of anxiety and so for a long time when I was just alone with myself my mind would flood with anxious or intrusive thoughts and I'd start to feel really scared-- almost a deep sense of dread. This year one of my main goals has been to feel more comfortable being alone with myself because it's sad to me that it has become such a scary thing. I'm still not where I want to be yet, but this article reminds me of the beauty of just being with my true self🌷 thank you:)
When we are alone, we tend to think; which is not something you can stop or control. You might think that you can, but you may control a thought or two, but not every thought that crosses your mind. Now this, alone, is not easy to handle. because In Islam we have something called ‘nafs’ and i can explain it as “the ID” its one of the components of the human soul; ID, ego, and superego; defined by Sigmund Freud. The ID might tell you things that you don’t want to hear, you dont want to do, but you can’t help listening to it. Which what drives us crazy if we let it control us over time. It’s basically your obsessive thoughts about a certain situation, or a craving, or being unable to control a certain need. This is what makes us terrified to be alone. Because we won’t be actually alone, the ID will be our companion.
I have this very bad Impostor Syndrome that makes me believe that I'm a liar who doesn't know who I am. When I realized how bad it is that I see myself that way, I started to ask myself whether I was doing it for myself or the perception of the people around me—and it changed me. I got to know myself more.
Emily, I thank you for allowing my brain to pause.. to quiet even with a phone in my hand, my noisiest possession. you ask a VERY important question here, posing such a gentle invitation. i loved this piece & how it felt like i was in your space with you, enjoying the same feelings you were in your quiet. this was great and well needed <3
It's funny how your article made me think that's since many years in other way around. I know who, and what, I am when I'm alone but maybe not so much around people who don't know me, anymore?
Absolutely loved this post! It left me with a lot to think about and ponder over about myself. I guess in a way, it's the fear of being perceived that has crept its way so deep, it's now part of me even when I'm alone and there isn't anyone around me that can potentially perceive me. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for reading!! I totally get that - we always feel like we're under surveillance in a way, have to do/act/see things a certain way. It's so easy to lose sight of who we actually are with the outside voices and society telling us what we "should" be doing. ♥️
so so so beautifully written emily. i love our conversations and love you even more. and i love your writing so dearly. it feels like it's such a close hold to the heart even though the writing isn't my own. incredible incredible
This is beautiful! I have a lot of anxiety and so for a long time when I was just alone with myself my mind would flood with anxious or intrusive thoughts and I'd start to feel really scared-- almost a deep sense of dread. This year one of my main goals has been to feel more comfortable being alone with myself because it's sad to me that it has become such a scary thing. I'm still not where I want to be yet, but this article reminds me of the beauty of just being with my true self🌷 thank you:)
This is such a beautiful comment 🩷 it’s so scary - but such a meaningful journey!! Thank you so much for reading ✨✨🫶🏻🫶🏻
I will tell you what we are all afraid of.
When we are alone, we tend to think; which is not something you can stop or control. You might think that you can, but you may control a thought or two, but not every thought that crosses your mind. Now this, alone, is not easy to handle. because In Islam we have something called ‘nafs’ and i can explain it as “the ID” its one of the components of the human soul; ID, ego, and superego; defined by Sigmund Freud. The ID might tell you things that you don’t want to hear, you dont want to do, but you can’t help listening to it. Which what drives us crazy if we let it control us over time. It’s basically your obsessive thoughts about a certain situation, or a craving, or being unable to control a certain need. This is what makes us terrified to be alone. Because we won’t be actually alone, the ID will be our companion.
I have this very bad Impostor Syndrome that makes me believe that I'm a liar who doesn't know who I am. When I realized how bad it is that I see myself that way, I started to ask myself whether I was doing it for myself or the perception of the people around me—and it changed me. I got to know myself more.
such a lovely read! and another good stuff to think of. here’s to hoping we find comfort and delight in being with ourselves 🩷
Ahh absolutely! All of the best things 🩷💘 thank you for reading!
Emily, I thank you for allowing my brain to pause.. to quiet even with a phone in my hand, my noisiest possession. you ask a VERY important question here, posing such a gentle invitation. i loved this piece & how it felt like i was in your space with you, enjoying the same feelings you were in your quiet. this was great and well needed <3
It's funny how your article made me think that's since many years in other way around. I know who, and what, I am when I'm alone but maybe not so much around people who don't know me, anymore?
Absolutely loved this 🫶🏼
GREAT post! Thanks for sharing. ❤️
Thank you so much for this🫶
Thank you for reading 💘💘
Amazing
Thank you!! 🩷
Absolutely loved this post! It left me with a lot to think about and ponder over about myself. I guess in a way, it's the fear of being perceived that has crept its way so deep, it's now part of me even when I'm alone and there isn't anyone around me that can potentially perceive me. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for reading!! I totally get that - we always feel like we're under surveillance in a way, have to do/act/see things a certain way. It's so easy to lose sight of who we actually are with the outside voices and society telling us what we "should" be doing. ♥️
so so so beautifully written emily. i love our conversations and love you even more. and i love your writing so dearly. it feels like it's such a close hold to the heart even though the writing isn't my own. incredible incredible
🥲🥲💞💞💞